From Boss to Antonio
by TheLlamaArmada628
Summary: Because her inheritance Romano has to hide her gender from her boss, but what happens when Spain suddenly visits years after telling him she was going to be independent? Will he find out? Chibi!RomanoXBoss!Spain and Fem!RomanoXSpain, fluff n stuff, beginning to end. Rate T for Romano's beautiful vocabulary.
1. Swimming with Boss

**It bothered the heck out of me, that I made a USUK story but not a Spamano one, so here it is! This is not a one-shot as said in description it's from beggining to end (Well not until they die or something just until Lovino is Lovina to poor clueless Antonio.) My first Spamano~! Hope you enjoy! Please do review, as usual if no one reviews, no more will be made:) I currently have 3 stories going, I can juggle but I won't continue on something no one wants.**

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"Oh, come on, Lovi! Take your shirt off! We can go swimming together that would be fun, si?"

"Che palle! I'm not taking my shirt off around you!" I stood on the shore of Barcelona, just starring at my Boss.

"Come on Lovi, swimming alone isn't fun! Boss has been so busy, with the Turkey and Eyebrows and now Netherlands!" Boss whined.

"Fine, y-you bastard! But it's not for you! It's just hot that's all!" I slowly peeled off my shirt, I'm as flat as a board so why the fuck not? And it's hot damn it!

"Yay! Romano you make boss so happy!" Spain skipped closer to no doubt trying to engulf me in a hug.

"Don't say weird shit like that shirtless! You bastard!" I whined, splashing him before he tried to get any closer.

"Porque? We're both hombres, no?" He questioned. HUH? I probably made the stupidest face ever. He didn't _really_ think that I was a boy, right? Sure, I had short hair b-but that's because I didn't want that piano bastard to ask me to do house work and shit, I'd rather climb up in a tree and hide until dinner then do dishes!

"Che?!" I gasped after seconds of speechlessness.

"Che? Que?" After a second of no answer, he moved on. "I can't wait to show you all sorts of manly thi_" This was getting weird damn it! I can't believe this!

"CHIGI!" I head-butted him. Serves him right for thinking wrong!

"Ah! Romano! What was that for?!" He stumbled back in surprised, while I ran for the shore.

"Weird ass bastard! Don't come any closer! D-damn it! Stay right there! I swear if you… if you go after me I'll… I'll runaway!" I said hot tears running down my face. I was upset, damn it! And I know I shouldn't be, but…I thought we were close and but the bastard can't even guess my gender. I should've known he didn't want to get to know me. He just wants my inheritance, just like the rest!

"Wait! Romano! What's wrong?" Despite my warning he walked up onto the shore toward me.

"Nevermind! Bastard!" I realized I was yelling. "I-I'm going." I hoped that he didn't catch that I didn't give a location.

"Where? Romano, I'm sorry." He said, of course when I want him to be clueless he becomes intuitive, fuck, I did not just use that word. His emerald eyes gave me a sad look, I hate seeing him this way, but I didn't want to see him smiling either! Damn conflicting emotions!

"For what?" I asked. "You didn't do anything, I'm just being a brat, like I always am, I'm always a fuck up, I'll just go." I stuttered.

"Wait!" I ignored him and ran, as far as I could, until…

"Oof!" I fell backward. "Watch where you're going stupid bastard!" I yelled looking up.

"Hi sweetie, what are you doing all the way out here? Spain's must be worried sick!" It was Belgium, she looked worried, and next to her was her scary ass brother, Netherlands. But I was too upset to care.

"Hey Dutch-bastard." I said toughly.

"Hm?" He grunted.

"I'm a girl! You know that don't you?! Well?!" I yelled.

He looked shock for a split second then turned to his sister, who looked equally shocked.

"Lovino! You're not supposed to tell people that!" Belgium gasped

"Heh? Why not the fuck not?! And who told you?!" I yelled.

"Hungary. Sweetie, is this because of Antonio?" She asked, bending down to my level, while I wiped my eyes and nodded, any dumbass could figure that out, no I'm crying because of England, I haven't even met that bastard but everyone talks about him.

"Honey, didn't you know?" She said tenderly, pushing stray hairs out off my probably tomato shaded face.

"What?!" I snapped impatiently.

"Once Ms. Hungary found out about your inheritance, she introduced you as a boy, because she wanted you to be trained as a man would, so no one would mess with you, and you could defend yourself. Sort of like how she was raised. Think of how much Antonio shields you, now imagine if he knew you were a girl, Sadiq, dead, France, probably castrated." She explained a bit overreacting. Damn _that wench Hungary! I'm not like her! I'm not strong! Making decisions for me! Who does she think she is?!_ I drew in a breath. _She was right though_. _Grazie_. I thanked her mentally.

"Tell her 'Grazie' damn it and to take care of my fratello!" I yelled before stomping off again.

"Of course sweetie! Take care now!" She waved.

I ran back to Madrid and stopped at a tomato stand for some fuel, running country to country is tiring as fuck! When all of a sudden I hear:

"LOOOOOVVVVIII!" I watched as Spain frantically searching downtown Madrid yelling my name, still…shirtless.

"Oi! I'm right here! Stop yelling…bastard." I waved, from next to a tomato stand.

"Lovi! Why did you run off? Boss was sooo worried!" He practically cried, crushing my bones in a hug.

"Sorry bastard." I grumbled, which trigged a goofy grin from Boss. My heart skipped a beat, damn it! What about this bastard makes me feel like this? I don't like it!

"I'm sorry, Lovi. If you didn't want to swim, you should have said so!" He cried. Really? I'm not surprised at this point, clueless, as usual, no wonder, he didn't notice.

"I did!" I shrieked.

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**Okay, that's short, the plot thickens if you guys like, this is more like a preview into the rest of it. So if you guys review I will update immediately tomorrow:)**


	2. Pinky promises and Lady cycles

**As promised! Thanks for all the support guys~! Please do review, I love to see what you guys have to say. If any corrections or any SUGGESTIONS, I would definately take them! Hope you enjoy~!**

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"Lovi!" That bastard hugged me, he was wearing that practically see through white collar shirt and those jeans that grab his hips and his back side tightly, his gardening clothes, I checked, yup, gardening gloves, and the sun hat. He smelled like tomatoes too as usual

It took me a while, but I realized my feelings for the tomato-bastard. There's no non mushy way to say it, I had given completely denying it.

"Aw~Lovi looks like a tomato again, if I didn't know better, I'd say you were in love with me!" He smiled goofily.

"Hell no!" Okay maybe not COMPLETELY. He rubbed his cheek against mine, and let go.

"Boss is going change, and then go out again, I will return, I promise." He held out his pinky finger.

I was beyond pissed, the moment I admit my feelings for him, he runs off to war repeatedly, with nothing but a stupid ass pinky promise every time he left. Not this time!

"No."

"Romano."

"No."

"Ah come on~! You're making boss sad." He held out his pinky again, still smiling, how could he keep smiling?!

"You should be damn it! Do you have any idea what will happen to me if you died out there?! I would disappear damn it! I can't defend myself! I know nothing! How the hell do you get off shielding me then leaving me defenseless?" I yelled.

"I'm sorry Romano, I know I'm being selfish, and you know Boss wouldn't want anything to happen to my Lovinito? Si?" _No, I'm being selfish, I just won't admit it, like the coward I am._

"Yeah, whatever not this time, just go." I grumbled.

"Okay ! I know!" An idea came to him suddenly. He picked a nearby flower and twisted it, _what the fuck is he doing?_ "Wear this! Lovino Vargas, I, Antonio Fernandez Carriedo promise to wed thee, when I get back. So I have something more to not die for." He smiled like it was an accomplishment. _Isn't just coming home to me enough?_

"This isn't a fucking joke, Spain." I growled, as he slipped on the flower ring.

"I'm not kidding." He said standing now.

"Both you and I know our bosses would never allow it, plus you don't love me like that." I hoped he would disagree but as usual he didn't.

"Si." He said in defeat, 'si' what? 'Si', you don't love me that way or 'si', our bosses wouldn't allow it. Be clear damn it! "Okay, I won't go then!"

"EH?" I gasped.

"You heard, Lovi, I won't go." He stood like he just solved all his problems, his men looked to me then their country, he can't do that to his people, what is he thinking?!

"Hell no bastard, you already get in enough trouble because of me." I defended.

"What's wrong Lovi?" he asked.

"Just go damn it! How many times do I have to tell you?!" I yelled impatiently.

"Okay." He looked shocked, not like this is his first time yelling at him. He turned and came out a few seconds later, iron clad, with his axe in hand. "Bye Romano." He said blankly and moped to the gate.

I don't feel bad, not at all. It's just a stupid pinky promise. If he dies_W-what if he really doesn't come back because I didn't pinky swear, it worked this far! No, that's a stupid superstition, but can I risk it?

I took off and ran with all my Italian might and caught up with the bastard.

"Hey wai_!" I tripped. _Fuck this hurts!_

"Romano!" Spain yelled, and came over to me. "What are you doing out here? Look your scraped your knee really badly." He assessed while he ripped some fabric to bandage my gushing knee with, I looked where he ripped it from, it was his fucking flag! He just ripped his fucking flag to bandage my knee!

"Oi! Don't do that! Hey! Stop!" I said swatting his hands. "HEY!" I grabbed his hand with the flag piece in it and took his pinky and made the promise right then and there. "Stop destroying yourself because of me! That's what this promise is about, isn't it?! That you'd return safely?! Answer me damn it!"

"Si, I'm sorry Lovi. And I will come back safely, just for you." He smiled.

"Yeah yeah." I tried to stand and limp home.

"Ah! Lovi did you hurt your behind too?" He questioned, pulling me down to his level again, so we were sitting face to face.

"What are you taking about bastar_" he flipped me over, to get a better look at my…eh-hem.

"You're bleeding there too." He pointed out.

"Eh?! I must've! It doesn't hurt or anything." I said pulling my pants to try to see the stain.

"Did France touch you?! Just say so and I'll kill him!" he said getting mildly upset.

"No. I must've scrapped it or something, I'll deal with it when I get back to the house." I hurried him off.

"Lovi, that promise is two sided, you take care as well, you wouldn't want boss to come home to no Lovi, verdad? That would make boss sad, boss loves to have Lovi around, even if we are far away, I'd still miss mi Lovinto, so please do take care of yourself, for boss, okay?! " He said the worry still in his voice.

"Yeah yeah, bastard, I'll watch out." I waved him off as I got back up to go back to the house.

"Adios!"He practically sung.

"Addio!" I yelled back. Damn, I'm bloody everywhere, I can already see the bastards eyes on me as I hobbled back to the house, seemingly ready race to catch me if I fell. Not this time, I've got to learn to walk on my own. Damn it! And I will!

"Romano! Romano honey! Where are you?! I know Spain left, I need to talk to you!" I heard a familiar womanly voice yell, it was Hungary. Great, Belgium must've told her of my episode earlier on this evening.

"I'm over here! Damn it!" I yelled not being able to walk faster than a limp.

"Oh! Romano! It's so nice to see you again!" She scooped me up in a hug that had my legs dangling in the air.

"P-put me down damn it! I'm not a kid anymore!"

"Of course not~" She cooed, she didn't believe me but she put me down anyways.

"Let me open the door first, well talk inside." I hissed.

"Huh?" Hungary looked to my pants stain then suddenly started tugging at my pants.

"What the hell?!" I said caught off guard at her sudden inquisition.

"Romano! You're a woman?!" She gasped.

"Damn it woman! I thought you knew that already!" I yelled shocked. Wait! How can she know that by just looking at my clothed butt?

"No! I think you started your womanly cycle." She squealed.

"W-womanly c-cycle?" I stuttered.

"Yes, it means you are fit to have babies now!"

"THE FUCK?!"

"And that you'll be bleeding every month for a few weeks."

"I-I'll die losing that much blood!"

"You'll live."

"If I bleed through my clothes every month, won't the bastard find out?"

"No, he won't. Trust me." She said patting my shoulder. "Just put a rag in your undergarments and_"

"Stop there. I-I got it." I sputtered. "Fuuuuccck." I sighed out of frustration.

"Good, now let's talk business." She cheered, there's something wrong with this woman, I bet she's only this way with other women and children.

"Not out here, let's go inside" I invited her in and we sat on the couches, staring at each other, I stared, she smiled, this was like starring at Feliciano, creepy.

"I'll say it plainly. Mr. Austria, France, and I think you should leave Spain." I wasn't surprised, they're worried about him…bastards.

"Okay, I will."

"Really?! Whyyy?!" She sounded like she wanted me to stay with the bastard, make up your mind woman.

"Cheh! You forget I'm a country too! Hell! I am the granddaughter of the Roman Empire! I want independence as much as you guys damn it! " I explained.

"Oh yes." She chuckled mildly like she forgot, probably did…

"Plus my chest has been hurting lately, I think I'm growing …those." I pointed to her breast like they were the devil.

"Yes, Feli told me how busty the women in your family can get." She now broke out in a full out laugh.

"Si-si, don't expect me to leave him so soon, I'm not ready yet damn it. But I promise you I will." I added the last part for a moment it sounded like I wanted to stay, well I kind of d_ no! I definitely DO NOT want to stay here, damn it. Okay, maybe a little, but who doesn't want free food and siesta's every day? It's hard to find a boss that takes siesta's, dio knows piano bastard doesn't.

"Yes, and I will help you with your lady problems until you do. I know how much you like Spain." She smiled.

"I don't like him like that!" I yelled.

"Mh-hm, that's why I had THIS painted!" She pulled out a painting from her bag, and held it out for me to see. My face turned red, it was me and Spain taking a picnic outside last week and taking a siesta. Damn this woman!

"Don't be sending weird ass painters to paint weird ass paintings of people!"

"I had your brother draw it." She smiled again, practically drooling at the picture, she held it like it was gold or something.

"I'm going to kill him." I grumbled

"Well I have to go! Bye~!" She sped off out the door.

"Mio dio please don't let me turn out like her." I prayed, no seriously, please don't.


	3. Turks and Pirates

**GASP! TWO updates in one day?! Yep, because every follow, favorite, and review makes me squeal with joy everytime I get them, so please do continue to review and thanks so much for the support! And again if you give me any suggestions on who I should put in next or any suggestions on any awkward situations for Lovi and Toni to go through, that's very welcomed. I know I enjoy some Pirate!Spain so I put him in, if you likey him/it let me know:) Hope you enjoy this one, my longest chappy yet~!**

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The bastard came back a few weeks later like promised but he spent about 2 hours in the bath and none of his men came back with him. And I didn't mean that they went home either, with the amount of blood splashed all over him, he looked like her had a cannon ball hit him in the stomach, he probably heal then came home immediately, probably stayed with France for a while, this is what usually happens when all goes to shit. I just got used it.

"Welcome home, bastard." I said as nicely as I could opening the door for him, he went past without a word, that's how I know it's best to just try to leave him alone. It's not that he's purposely ignores me, the death of his people is all he can think of until he settles some weird inner war with himself, at least that's how France explained it to me, one strange day, anyway, he usually is back to his normal self the next day. But for the moment, I know dinner isn't going to be made, so I'll either starve like I usually do or make my own food. Which I haven't done in years, and with the day I had, you bet your ass I'll make my own food, so pasta it is! And the Italian kind too, but we have no Italian ingredients, so I have to drag my ass to the store, joy.

I stepped outside and threw my hood on and all of a sudden I was knocked over and snatched up.

"I finally got you!" It was the Turkey!

"Let me go you bastard!" I struggled, damn if I'm going to be independent anytime soon, I'll need to show that I can take care of myself! So I bit his arm.

"You little brat!" He spat and swung his sword instinctively, making a shallow cut on my face. "Shame you have such a nice face."

"It'll heal bastard! Now fight me!" I yelled, pulling my own sword.

"Huh? What is this?" he looked confused, then jolted backward in some weird realization "I'm not going to teach you! That's just laughable!"

"Fuck you! I learned already!"I spat.

"Are you sure?" He shrugged. "So ol' emerald eyes taught you finally you, huh?"

"As if! Nonno taught me!" I said getting in to stance, he pretty much crushed us with it when we were younger, I'd never forget how to fight.

"Uh-huh" he sheathed his sword. "I don't fight kids."

"Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you! Put me down! SPAAAAAIIIINN!" I yelled.

"Now you are my colony!" He proclaimed, when he finally got me into the carriage.

"Hell no."

"I gained you fair and square, what do you mean 'no'?" He questioned.

"You snatched me while I was going to get groceries, how is that fair and square? Bastard!"

"I did?" he blinked.

"Yes! What did you think I was doing outside without Spain?!" I yelled.

"Uh, I don't know running away or something." He waved it off.

"Sure-sure, just let me go."

"No, you're at my house now. You're not allowed to leave until I say so." He crossed his arms.

"And when will that be bastard?" I challenged.

"Never." He deadpanned

"That's ridiculous!" I gasped

Grrrrrrrr~

"Hungry little brat?" He raised a cocky brow.

"…"

"I'll take that as a yes. Now get in the carriage, and don't think you can jump out or run away, my men are watching you." He said scarily.

"Your eyes do not scare me princess jasmine, compared to Spain you're nothing!" I haven't seen that side of Spain personally, but I've been told what he does with his other colonies, I keep telling myself that it isn't him, because I know the Spain I'm used to is not that man. But when he talks about the war, I can see that, that Spain really does exist.

"He's a formidable opponent." He mulled over. "But I leave scars now get in before that scar on your face becomes and X instead of a line." I got in.

**Moments later…**

I found myself in a ridiculous hat eating some really good food. Don't be fooled, I missed Spain and I wondered if he even noticed I was gone. But for the moment I had good food in front of me and despite all the shit storms this week, my day looked pretty damn good.

"So Lovina." He asked casually.

"Hm?"

"So it is true, you are a girl." He sighed.

"How'd you know?!"

"My neighbor and arch rival is a girly looking motherfucker and I've looked over Hungary long enough to know the difference between a cross-dressing woman and a girly man."

"No! Look! I may have been born a girl, but don't get it wrong, to the world, I'm a boy!"

"Wear this, it's traditional in my country." He held up a dress.

"No."

"Take this." He held out a flower.

"Now what?" I asked confused on where this was going.

"Now you tell the world who you really are. I realize Elizabeta and your farce to hide your gender was made to protect you, but it will not turn out the way she thought it would."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because history tends to repeat itself." He said quickly and harshly then moved on. "Your and Elizabeta's situation are totally different, she was strong and she didn't know she was a female, you on the other hand know what you are, and do not believe this trick, and although you can defend yourself if necessary, you will crumble to the world's way because you know nothing of the outside world, you, Lovina Vargas, will fade, this plan won't work out because you were raised to be dependent on another country, you need a man to protect you."

"Fuck you! I can take care of myself!" I snapped.

"Oh really? So if I were to release you as my colony, you could tell me that you could fight off others trying to claim you as theirs? England has a long arm around the world, so does your ex-boss Spain, he'll definitely want to claim you as his, could you tell him 'no'?" He said that last part in an odd way, but I couldn't tell why." And how about those who want to take revenge on Spain? Even if you actually do tell him no, could you fend off all those enemies of his that want to hurt you or even claim you just to spite him? How about that little brother of yours, do you really think that you can_"

"Alright! Damn it! I get it! I'm not fucking ready yet! But I will!"

"Who will teach you then willingly let you go? That's what colony countries are they'll always be colonies!"

"No damn it! Spain will let me go!"

"Over. His. Dead. Body. He treats you like his treasure, damn, I wouldn't doubt he thinks of you that way. He will never let you go, anyone who thinks he will are fools, if you stay with him, you will be his forever, until the both of you die, you know he's fighting to keep you so desperately putting his life on the line for you, how do you think he'll react when you say you want to be independent? You're more dense than I thought you were if you thought he'd actually let you go, he'd probably revert to treating you like the rest of his colonies just out of fear of you actually leaving him."

"So what? You me to stay with you?" I asked sarcastically.

"Yes. I would let you go, Lovina. I'm already his enemy, so he doesn't have to hurt his friends, I'm stronger than him, if you stay with me now, he couldn't possibly pull the resources to get you back, he'd have to spend the rest of his time pulling himself together, that or he'd kill himself." He chuckled. "This little plan of yours chances of actually working is little to none, so I ask you South Italy, Lovina Vargas. Be mine now, and be the great empire you were meant to be." He held my hand, taking the flower out of it and placing it into my hair, brushing my hair behind my ear

This bastard talking about Spain like that, he'd never treat me like that.

_Of course he would mia nipote, you're not like Feliciano, your personality sucks, he wouldn't actually want you, he wants our land, it's natural for him to become violent to keep it, once he gets it he'll throw you aside like the trash you are._

No! Damn it! No! Go away! I thought I got rid of you! Why won't you just leave?

_I did, I, like everyone, I got tired of you and left. But you know everything I say is true, that's why your mind has created my voice when really it's just you telling yourself what you already know, I gave you my land because I felt pity for you, because without it you are nothing! A nobody! No one would be nice to you! You're worthless!_

No stop it! Grandpa Rome! Just go away!

"Well?" Sadiq asked, snapping me out of my nightmare. I thought about it for a while, when I remembered our pinky promise, and what he said.

"_Lovi, that promise is two sided, you take care as well, you wouldn't want boss to come home to no Lovi! That would make boss sad, boss loves to have Lovi around, even if we are far away, I'd still miss mi Lovinto, so please do take care of yourself, for boss, okay?! "_

He cares! I know he does! Or else he wouldn't have done or put up with me for this long, why go through the trouble if he didn't? I have to have faith in that, that at least one person, actually likes me for me, not my land. Just one…

"No. I trust Spain. When I'm ready, he'll let me go, I know he will." I said confidently.

"We'll see about that, my offer stands, if you wake up from your fairytale and see the truth." He sighed in defeat and leaned back.

"Sadiq."

"Yeah." He looked to me, the candle light between us getting dimmer.

"Take me home." I deadpanned.

"If you marry me, sure" he chuckled sarcastically.

"Fuck you asshole! I'll walk!" I stood and walked for the door when all of a sudden an axe was put through it, Sadiq grabbed me and pulled me back from the doorway as someone axed down the door. Spain.

"Sadiq! My country may not be faring well, but I will personally kill you if you don't release Lovi, right now."

" .tsk. Now look at the mark you put on Lovino's face." He said snidely, tracing his finger on the cut on my face he made on my face earlier today.

"L-lovi! I-I'm so sorry!" He started looking shattered, like he was about to cry, he was on the brink of tears, shaking, trying to keep them down in front of his enemy.

"You didn't do this bastard! He did! Let's just cut the crap and go home!" I said casually shouldering Sadiq's hand off my shoulder and taking Spain's hand and guiding him out.

"But Lovi_" Spain started.

"Come on!" I whined, he kept stopping.

"LOVI!" He shouted, he still shook but for a different reason now, I saw a small glint of that crazed look on his face _that _Spain was coming out. "He hurt you… I can't let him get away with that, _mi_ preciosa tesoro, NO one can touch you but me, eres mio solomente, para toque, tener, _todo_. Me entiendes?" He put a hand on my face and stroked his thumb along the cut, stroking it after every verb. Yeeeah, he gets really protective and lovey, when he turns to the other Spain especially towards me. I've learned to just ignore him and say 'yeah' to everything, he hasn't tried anything so far but I know it won't always be this way… it's just a matter of when. And it seems the time is now, he wanted to _kill_ Turkey.

"Look, I'm tired and I haven't taken a siesta yet." I said quickly and nervously, trying to think of something to distract him from his rage. "And… I still haven't changed my sheets from that damn squirrel pissing on my bed, so I'll have to sleep with you." I said to cheer him up. He searched my face and ran his thumb over the cut on my cheek , then stood up.

Suddenly _he_ was pulling _me_.

"Yay! Lovi's going to take a siesta with boss!" He cheered now running home, and from the way he said it, he still wasn't _my_ Spain he was still _that one_, will I ever get the bastard back? "Let's gooooo~!" W-wait! I was going to take a siesta with that bastard?! Oh boy…

"You bi-polar bastard! You tricked meeeee!" I squealed being swept away.


	4. I belong to U n U belong to me, GOT IT!

**Heya~! Well it's been a while hasn't it? Well thank you guys for reviewing! You guys are the best! So if you could be so kind as to keep reviewing:) It's how I know if you guys liked it or not. So please do. And sorry for the delay, therefore I made this one with fluff bits or a lot, you'll have to read. Geez, I'm such a tease:P**

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Needless to say the bastard didn't actually want to take a siesta, he just laid there and stared at me, I turned around who stares at you like that? I'll tell you who. This. Bastard. Here.

"Stupid bastard stop looking at me like that!" I could feel his eyes on me even though I turned around.

"Tan lindo." He whispered to himself. I turned back around.

"Okay, what the fuck are you looking at?" I snapped, it didn't faze him much instead he smiled at the attention. FUCK!

"You." He said now getting taking my upset face in and smiling seductively, he wouldn't!

"I-I don't like you staring at me like your mentally undressing me you stupid bastard! I-It's hard to sleep."

" ." He waved my comment off and continued to stare. Not good, my face was turning red and I know it! That stupid ass half lidded stare!

"Lovi, you never did tell me why I can't touch your curl." His hand crept up, and I smacked it away, when…

He took my hand and pinned me down. I knew a siesta was a bad idea.

"What the hell are you doing bastard?!"

"How old are you now Lovino?"

"2! Now get off of me."

"Play nice and I'll let you go, not as a colony of course, but from this hold that has your face in that beautiful shade of red." He chuckled darkly. Fuck! I'm going to be raped! I struggled more but the bastard had a firm grip, I felt tears running down my face, helpless, again.

"How old are you?"

"17."

"Hm, many say that at that age a country should be released from being colonized."

"Si?" I sniffled.

"I want to let you know, that that will never happen, not as long as I'm alive. No matter if you hate me Lovino, I'll keep you safe at my side. So please mi amor, stop crying."

"Bastard I don't need your help! I don't need you!"

"Is that why you can't get out of a simple wrist hold?" He challenged."Someone can really take advantage of you in a position like this." I pretended not to notice that he licked his lips there…

"I'm not a girl damn it, let go!" I squirmed again but this time he got off.

"No worries mi querido, I wouldn't do that to you…unless you want me to." He lifted his chin in a devilish cocky smile while raising an eyebrow.

"What makes you think I would be attracted to a bastard like you, I'm a boy damn it! That's just wron_" Just as I thought I made him rage, he swiftly grabbed the collar of my shirt and crushed his lips onto mine, a plain and simple kiss, not a peck, an actual kiss. My face flushed red, damn it! Even redder than a fucking tomato, he fucking kissed me… And still is! He finally broke the kiss, and studied my face again.

"Y-you bastard that was my first kiss! A-and you stole it!"

"Oh. I'm sorry, tell me Lovi, who were you planning to give it to?" His cupped my chin and got in my face as he said it dripping in sarcasm, his eyes looking crazed, kind of like when that Teutonic knight guy accidently smashed piano- bastard's piano, yeah that crazed look. I don't know why he's so obsessed with me. I'm nothing special…

"Forget I said anything." I pouted just staring at my hands in my lap, he lifted my chin again, that crazed look in his eyes still, this bastard has two looks, seductive and crazed, I preferred neither.

"That's what happens when you challenge my power, especially my passion, I am the country of passion, Lovi, I know what I mean when I say 'Te amo'." His eyes locked with mine in a smug seriousnesss.

"You didn't say that!" I protested, my face turning red gain.

"Do I need to? Or are you that blind not to see it?" He hoped off the bed. "That bastard may be too shy to admit it but I will say it a thousand times over no matter who's watching, that is the difference between Spain and I." He said the last part like it was a big secret he was revealing.

"Speaking of when's the bastard coming back anyways?" I asked.

"You knew?!" He gasped.

"Of course, you insult my intelligence! I know which from which when I see it, I always knew." I said sitting up.

"Lovi?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you remember how we first met?"

"If you're asking me when I realized it, it when I attacked that German soldier and you scolded me, you were the one who compared my face to a tomato in the first fucking place. Spain would never scold me in the first place and he definitely wouldn't have called me a 'damned brat'."

"The bastard could've just had a bad day, how'd you know for sure?"

"Every day in this war is a bad day for him, he doesn't bring his worries home… he leaves them with you. Damn it this sounds so weird, I just know the both of you well, okay?" I shouted. I heard a huge thud, and Spain was on the floor, barely conscious.

"Spain!" I yelled rushing over to him. "Damn it! What's the matter with you?!" I asked, pulling him onto my lap.

"I feel him coming back, I don't know when I'll see you again, if I ever get to see you again… por favor, please, wait for me."

"Si bastard, now rest."

"Good. A pirate goes sailing for that one treasure and once he finds it he dies trying to protect it. I know you're too young to process it, but that's how I feel, just so you know if I fade with time. Because you are mine." He put a possessive hand on my cheek.

"You keep saying that." I wanted to say that I don't belong to anyone, but damn, I'd feel bad.

"And I am yours." He looked to me longingly, like he was waiting for me to pour my heart out.

"Si." Was all I could think to say, he smiled weakly and closed his eyes. Damn it why couldn't you be normal and fall in love with a girl? Why me?

"Huh? Morning already? I don't remember walking home, buenos dia…s, Lovi why are you crying?" He sat up and held me.

"Why do you care so much? It's not fair. I don't deserve it." I cried into his shirt.

"That's tus abeulo talking isn't it? Mirame Lovino, I don't know what happened while I was out, but you deserve everything, you may not be that saintly but none of us are, so you must stop condemning yourself, it makes boss sad to see you like this. You should be happy, I have you and you have me, that's all we need, si?" He beamed, not even aware or giving a shit that he just woke up in a different place, and missing hours maybe days of memories, stupid bastard…I'm so glad he's back!

"Si." That's all I've been saying today…but really I don't give a shit. Boss has my back.


	5. My knight is my brother

**I had a dream about this so I thought I'd type it up and share it as usual I love your reviews, m glad you guys like possessive Spain. Nyways here it is! (P.S.) This chapter has both Lovi's and Toni's POV so sorry about the OOCness for Spain I've never written in his POV, I'm a tsundere, how am I supposed to know what a yandere's thought are?! M sorry don't hurt me... PLEASE REVIEW.**

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"Good morning Lovi!" Spain cheered with his apron and spatula in hand.

"Good Morning Spain." I said sleepily staring at the table, shit happened.

It was quiet for a good while, surprisingly the bastard was quiet, wonder what his_OH MY GOD!

He had a dark aura surrounding him and he had a twitchy smile on, resembling Hungary's crazed battle look. Mio Dio What the fuck his happening?!

"No bastard? No Jerk? Or Fuck off?" All these words coming from Spain…what's his deal? But it is kind of strange that I didn't say anything…must've been because of last night.

"Sorry…bastard." I said sheepishly.

"LOVI! WHAT"S WRONG?!" He threw his pan to the side which happens to fly out the window, and trapped me in a bear hug.

"Y-Your overreacting bastard, put me down, damn it!" I struggled.

"What is it Lovi? You can tell boss." He said worriedly, I could tell he could see right through me, damn him for knowing my facial expressions so well.

"I-I have to go home, right now."

"Porque?" He seemed a bit calmer now, but still concerned.

"There's been problems in Rome, I have to go." I put it shortly, Grandpa Rome had wrote me some pretty detailed and threatening messages, I had to go before his temper spiraled out of control, sometimes I wonder, why I keep running to his rescue, oh yeah, because he held my fucking capital in his hands, if Rome fails then the rest of South Italy will, why couldn't he lived with Feli instead?!

"Okay, me entiendo, just be careful, and hurry back." He said patting my shoulder, damn him for understanding me so much. I'm so indebted to him that selling all the tomatoes in Italy wouldn't be able to pay him back enough, and that's a lot of fucking tomatoes.

"Yeah, yeah, bastard, I will." I threw on my hood and went, as usual Spain walked me to the gates, and let me go as soon as he was sure Turkey or France wasn't around. Bastard, any regular country would've run away, me, I have to stay. I have nowhere to go… both he and I know I can't ever go home.

Spain's POV

Mi Lovino has grown so much… but I can't help but to wonder what has him so upset. I walked into the house, which already felt empty without him, what did I do before Lovi was mine? Garden, I already did that, eat, I threw my food out the window along with a pan France had given me, and Sleep, I just woke up! I sighed, I could do paperwork, nah…

I know I'll clean Lovi's room, it's usually a mess. I made my way up the stairs and into Lovi's room and nada, as clean as I left it mañana. Something was defiantly wrong with Lovi, I noticed some pillows and blankets bundled up on the window sill, he must've slept there last night. I picked up the sheets and folded them when a letter fell out. It was from Rome.

_Lovino, where the hell you've been? You're a sorry excuse for a grandson you know that! The people need help over here! Maybe if you stopped fucking the Spaniard you would be as great as I was, but then again I never expected much from you in the first place. Because of you, I had to interrupt Feliciano's piano practice, your brother is already taller than you, and can paint and play instruments even greater than the Greeks did. What have you been doing there? You are a colony, si, so is your fratello, that's no excuse to let that bastard put his hands all over you literally and politically. Do you enjoy him touching you? Of course you do or else you would've left him already! You're sick! Vatican may have not noticed your blasphemous acts, but I sure as hell haven't. Making love to another man, what the hell is wrong with you? You shame all of Italy, this outbreak of disease is your fault, you and your sickening acts, you made god angry at all of us and now your brother and I are paying the price, I hope you're happy. I'm coming over now, to give that sick pervert a piece of my mind and take you home, as much as I hate having to take you back, I'm willing to forgive your sins, if you confess to your homosexual acts and beg for forgiveness for shaming Italy in public to all of Italy and the Church. This is all I ask, you should be so grateful that I'm willing to take you in again. I pray god will show as much mercy on you as I have. Don't think I won't beat your face into the ground when I see you, next, you can bet on it._

_Nonno_

"Homosexual acts with…me?" Where'd he get that idea from? The Rome I know is a very kindly manly man, I know he said some negative things to Lovi, but I just thought Lovi was being a crybaby like he usually is, I had no idea it was this bad. I may not be great at feeling the mood but I sure as hell know two things: One, that bastard intends to take Lovino away from me, which I would die before letting that happen, and two, he intends to hurt him, and I would go to hell before that happens. How dare he say such cruel things to my Lovino.

"Sir, an Italian man is here to see you." Juan my messenger said.

"That must be Romano, what's the problem?" I asked, tucking the letter into a drawer.

"No, it's not Romano, sir." He said, this is it, me against the Great Roman Empire. First though I must send a letter.

"Hello Spain." He greeted hugging me, this just doesn't make sense. How could someone like this write such a nasty letter (AN: Think of getting a nasty letter from Tom Hanks or Morgan Freeman, you just don't see it happening)

"Hola Rome." I said

"What's the matter Spain?"

"Nothing, why the sudden visit, Senor Vargas?"

"I'm here to see my grandson, of course."

"You cannot see him." I said quickly.

"Oh? Why not?" He asked raising a brow. "Have you sent him away?"

"Si." I said going through the closet for my coat.

"Where?" He said viciously, that's the real him, Spain, don't be fooled.

"I don't have to tell you, he's mine." I replied almost as threatening as him, my hands reaching for my axe.

"Yours? Touchy. I just need something from the brat and I'll be off." He said suddenly turning away, I put Maria (Spain's axe) away, and shut the closet. Sitting down at the table.

"What do you need?" I asked taking a bite of a tomato.

"Money." He deadpanned. All those harsh words to Lovi for money? Unforgivable! I clenched my teeth, I shouldn't get too worked up or else I'll black out and who knows what might happen.

"That's all you want isn't it?" I growled.

"You know out of all the people that took the riches of my land when it was torn from me, I expected you to be the most successful, it pains me to see you slowly crumble such a tiny island." He challenged.

"Well he went to go see you." I could feel the tomato juice dripping onto my hands from how harshly I was holding it.

"Well I must've passed him, sorry for the intrusion." He said closing the door behind him.

"Si." I said, thank dio, I didn't have to fight him.

I threw on my coat and ran out the back door, Lovi, please wait for me!

Lovino POV

I wonder what the bastards doing right now, he usually sends a message at the border to ask if I'm okay, he's never failed to do it, damn it, he's a grown ass man he probably busy. Okay, this sounds really conceited but Spain always made time for me, even before a battle he'd send me a letter, something must've gone wrong. I didn't see nonno on the way so it couldn't have been him. Damn it, I have no choice but to sit here until a message comes if not, then…then, I'll have to rescue him damn it.

"Ah, there you are Romano." I heard a voice say, no, it can't be.

Spain's POV

I ran to France's house. I should've taken a horse! I'll ask France he's a good amigo.

"Hola, Jacques have you seen France anywhere?"

"That's a funny question sir. I guess…everywhere?" Oh, human names.

"I mean Francis? Monsieur Bonnefoy?"

"Oh he went off in a hurry, maybe a lady friend call." He shrugged, typical France, I need you now, and your off with a woman?

I hope I get there in time!

Lovino POV

"K-kill me now, you bastard, finish me, it's what you always wanted." I spat blood at his shoes.

"Trust me I want to." He smiled darkly, kicking me over with his foot.

He lifted his foot probably to crush what chances I have of walking again.

"Stupid bastard, where are you?" I cried lowly, I closed my eyes, and surprisingly felt no pain, I opened my eyes.

"Bonjour, I know I'm not your knight in shining armor but it will work for now, oui?" He laid himself over me to take the blow, bastard, why you too? Who else needs to get hurt because of me?

"F-france?" I asked.

"Oui the one and only." I saw blood running down his mouth.

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

"Whatever for Romano? You know it makes frère happy to help, I'll always be there for you _and_ your brother." He winked and got off. And pulled his rapier from its sheath and got into fighting position.

"Cheh, take him, then, he's not worth anything to me anyways." Nonno scoffed and walked off.

"Well that was close, wasn't it?" France asked but then stopped, when he saw my face damn it, I'm such a baby…

"It's okay to cry, Romano."

"No it isn't! I'm a man damn it! Men aren't supposed to cry."

"Well, I cry every time, I see a picture of my Joan. No one blames me for doing it, it's natural, so_" I busted out into tears as he stroked my hair, avoiding the curl…for now. I knew there was a reason why Feli called him big brother, now I realize… he's always been there to back us up. I was too stupid to realize it, until now. Another debt owed, why am I so weak?

Antonio's POV

"LOVINO!" I yelled, Dio, where could he be?!

"Over here mon ami." I heard France yell from the right.

"France! What are you doing here?" I panted, having ran all the way to the Italian border, how Lovino does it, no se.

"I saw a messenger bird resting, so I read the message and took my horse immediately." He explained, lifting Lovino up, carrying him like a child. France had his hermano face on, so no worries on wondering hands…for now. "He fell asleep crying, must've been scared to death. Mon dieu Antoine I fear of what might've happened if I didn't get here when I did, who knew Rome was so violent?"

"Greece, the rest are dead." I answered.

"That was rhetorical mon ami, let's get Romano some medical help, just a few bruises and scrapes." He sadly chuckled, I helped him put Romano on the horse and walked back and rested at his house, I feel so ashamed to have doubted France.

"So want to tell me what's going on?" He asked from across the table.

"Romano has been abused by his abuelo since he was young. Both of them fooled us into thinking otherwise." I explained sadly. "France, I don't know what I would've done if I didn't make it."My grip on my fork tightened.

"What else are friends for? Plus you may not know it, but Feliciano and Lovino have been like brothers to me, we're family." He smiled nostalgically. "Let's not dwell in the past, you want some wine?"

"Por favor." I held out my glass as he filled it.

"Monsieur, c'est pire que nous le pensions! Lovino a une hémorragie interne, il ne s'arrêtera pas, monsieur ... Je ne pense pas que nous puissions faire quoi que ce soit à ce point." Jacques informed, I don't like his tone, something's wrong.

"France." I said worriedly.

"Mon dieu, Antoine…"

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**I'm such a troll, I'm not going to translate it for you, you can use Google translate or wait until next chapter, I'm so terrible:P I never thought that France was just a perv, I think he'd make a wonderful friend and big brother. And no, it's just the Bad touch duo for now, Prussia will make his awesome appearance soon. Kesesesesese~**


	6. Could've seen this a mile away

**Thanks for all your support seeing your reviews make me so very happy, so please let me know what you think of this chapter and review. Thx.**

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France's POV

"What? What is it?! France? Por favor! Si algo llegara a suceder a Lovi…" Spain started in rapid Spanish, then blacked out and his head hit the table with a very non sexy thud.

"OH CRAP!" HE'S coming, no pun intended, of course honhonhon~ "Um…Antoine?" I peeped.

"That was quick…" He grumbled. "Ah, France, tell me, what happened to Lovi." His axe appeared in his hand suddenly and started swinging at me, my sexy face! You better not ruin it you ungrateful brute!

"He has internal bleeding from earlier!" I pulled my rapier to keep the axe from bearing down onto my beautiful body. "This isn't the time for our usual introductions, go to him!"

"Si, you are right…take me to him." He ordered gruffly, while he rested his axe on his shoulder.

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Romano's POV

"Uh…my fucking head damn it, this sucks." I sat up empty, France's house. "So typical that fuck tard didn't show up, I'm not surprised if I lost my virginity while I was out, damn pervert. Wait_ WHA_" My clothes were ripped down the middle, my chest all out, thank god I have shorts on. But I was all patched up, that's good, I picked up the doctor's clipboard.

SEXE: FEMME

"Great…FUUUUUUUUUCCCCCK." I sighed, I stood up, and took the bandages from the cabinet and started wrapping my chest, damn B-cup, right after I complained about it, it grew, now I wish I was flat.

"Since the bastard isn't here might as well take my damn time, and do this right." Grumbled starting to bind my breasts.

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France's POV

"Okay let me check if Lovino's ok_" I started keeping Antoine in the hallway, while I check on the petite_I opened the door and Lovino was wrapping his…her…breasts. Wait no, I've grown up with the kid! I would know if he was the opposite sex, oui? I looked again….unmistakable! Lovino is…is…A GIRL!

"Hey you pervert I can see you, damn it! Turn around!" He…no, SHE yelled.

"Oui, Excusez-moi… Lovina."

"Oi, when did you find me out?! Where you the one who…" She became very red "Undressed me?" She finished.

"Of course not! I have more pride than to undress a woman while she's sleeping! It was a doctor!" I pouted, just because I have amour for amour doesn't mean I want to rape them! Okay, I push but I know when to stop, I'm not rapist! Mon dieu! Why does everyone think that?! "How long have you been a…woman?"

"Uh, since forever, shit France, people don't just change genders suddenly!" She yelled.

"They can! England_ wait did you just use my name?" I asked surprised usually it's something bastard, but she used my name.

"Well, yeah! You saved my life damn it! I was just saying grazie, so…grazie…wine-bastard." Her face really does resemble a tomato, but surprisingly seeing her this way doesn't change a thing, I feel no heart skipping, just as if she was still a he to me, not that gender really mattered to me in the first place, it's just he'll…she'll always be my brother in my mind, and that's even better, for such a lonely country like me, I've always wanted a sister.

"France, is that you? What happened? I woke up on the floor again!" Spain said on the other side of the door, at least Antoine's back to his cheerful self...

"Oh! In a minute, mon ami!" I yelled. "Get dressed."

"Into what? Bastard! The air?! My clothes are bloody and ripped in half!" She said sarcastically, her attitude suits her as a woman, as a man, she comes of like…well an asshole.

"Oh of course! Here!" I unbuttoned my shirt and threw it at her, she didn't complain, just got dressed. And immediately I opened the door.

"LOVIIIIIIII!" Antoine immediately ran to her and squeezed her harder than he should've.

"Oi, I'm fine, bastard, no thanks to you! Where were you?!" She cried/whined.

"I'm sorry, I came a minute too late but I'm so glad France got there before I did! I don't know what I'd do without mi tomate!" He squealed.

"Si,si, let's go home." She said pushing him off gently, I've never seen Spain so attached to somebody rather than myself and Lovina, here. At first I wondered why he would put up with my brat of a brother, but I see now looking into that adorable face, her face is doesn't match her words, you can read it like a book. I never saw that before, oh well! A barrier broken! Maybe my cute little sister will come visit me now like her younger brother, or is he? It'd make sense…

"Oi! Wine–bastard!" She barked.

"Oui?"

"We're going home." She stated and hopped off.

I watched them go, holding hands, maybe someday that dense friend of his will realize the truth. But for now he's on his own, Lovina's secret is safe with big brother! I waved goodbye and wondered how long it'd take Antoine to notice.

"Lovi?" Antoine asked her after waving goodbye to me.

"Si? What is it bastard?"

"Why is France shirtless?" He asked.

"Because it's hot obviously." She answered sarcastically.

"Good idea! Let's do that too!" Antoine cheered.

"Hell no!"

Good luck mon ami…you'll need it.

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Romano's POV

I woke up to a rapid beating at my door.

"LOoOOoOoOVIIII Sweetie~! It's Valentine's Day!" THAT'S NOT SPAIN!

"The FUCK? Hungary what are you doing here?!"

"I'm here with Feliciano~! Of course like every Valentine's day!" What the tomato?! Why are we celebrating an French/English holiday?! I swear holiday's were made just so people can have a reason to party.

"Ve~! Ciao sorella!" Feli poked his head out from behind Hungary, they both held boxes of chocolate and flowers for me, it's too early for this shit…

"Ciao Feli, I'm guessing tomato bastard already went to Bella's house?" I rubbed my eyes, since I now HAVE to wake up.

"Yes, what's wrong Lovi?" Oh, I don't know! The person that I like is having chocolate and waffles at the moment with a 10X hotter than me, Belgian chick. I like Bella, but not with Antonio in the picture…

I kept telling myself that if there was something there that it'd already have happened, since she boyfriend jumps every 5 seconds. That alone stopped me from crying every Valentine's day, he went there to be with friends, it helped France was going to be there, but at the same time, it kind of didn't.

"My name's LOVINA! Capisce?!"

"Ve~! Sorella that wasn't nice, Ms. Hungary's only trying to make you happy!" Feli pouted, I swear! Why was I born a girl and he a boy, that's so backwards!

"Sorry." I muttered. "What are you guys here for anyways?"

"We came here to give you this!" She held up a dress.

"Hell no! I'm a man!" I yelled.

"No worries, Ms. Hungary fixed will fix you u real good! You'll definitely look like a girl! She tried it on me a week ago, not even brother France recognized me!" France, huh? Hmm…

"Fine, just this once! And Feliciano stay away from France while you dress like that." I only say this cause I know he liked it (dressing like a girl). Backwards, I say, we should've been switched.

"Yes sir!" He saluted. He's even received military training before I have…I'm practically no use to my country anymore, am I?

"Let's hurry up and get this over with." I sighed, I am a girl, I have to embrace it, I won't ignore it like Feliciano, it's the least I could do.

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It took long enough, what half a day?! She said it was only an hour, an hour of what?! Putting fake hair on me, painting my fucking face, and getting me into fucking anti-breathing garments! It was an eternity! But when she showed me what I looked like…I couldn't believe it, I actually looked pretty…Well of course I'm pretty, I'm Italian! Ha, take that Belgian Seductress!

"Ve~Sorella, you look so pretty!"

"Yes! We should show you off, let's go to town, how about that just you me and Feli?" Ms. Hungary beamed at me.

"Hell no! What if someone recognizes me?!" I reasoned.

"They won't trust me. Come on boys." She marched off, expecting us to follow.

"Ve~Let's go. You don't want to be all alone here, si?" He stopped, he must've realized I was used to it, then left it at," Pleeeeaaassseee!"

"Fine, as long as you shut up, you and all this make-up are giving me a head ache." I growled.

"YAY! Ve~I'm sorry, sorella, yaaay." He whispered after cheering so loud.

"Whatever." I let him drag me to meet Hungary in the streets of Madrid. Tired of sightseeing and me practically giving them a tour, we stopped by a tomato stand. Things seemed nice and slowed down and non-dramatic for once when…

"Pobrecito, I know Lovi told me to go, but I couldn't stand the thought of him all alone and injured when I'm not off in battle to be there…but he said he didn't want to come… and he looked so sad when I told him about going to Bella's. I'm such a bad boss… I bet some tomatoes will make him feel better." I caught a glimpse of chocolate colored bed hair and then unmistakable green orbs met mine. "Hola senora bonita!" He smiled at me then looked up at my curl. "Are you Italian?"

"Ve~Sorella!" Feli held my hand and tugged at it, my heart stopping.

"Feli? I didn't know you had a sister!" He looked past me and to Feliciano.

I knew a there might've been trouble when I stepped out in this, but now there's a shit storm, and I'm right in the middle of it.

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**If you like, see a correction, or you're confused, leave a review. To clarify Lovina is slowly healing from her internal bleeding cause she's a country, since the doctor was a regular doctor, he perceived it as something deadly, but to her it's not. And yes, Dark Spain appeared for a little bit, oh and I apologize I've like NEVER written in France's POV, I was really scared, so sorry for the OOCness. Oh, and Prussia appears next chapter! :) **


	7. You know him!

**Hey guys, glad you like it so far! So here's another, please review:) Onto the chapter! Awwwwaaaaayyy!**

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"Um...I_" "She...uh." Feli and I thought, where the hell is Hungary?!  
"Kesesese~There you are schwester, the awesome me has returned!" A white haired albino man put his hand around my waist.  
"Chigi!" I yelled slapping him.  
"Chigi?! Its funny Lovi says that too, whats your name senora?" Boss asked damn it.  
"Chiara." My middle name...shit...  
"Mi chiamo Antonio Fernandez Carriedo." D-did he...just...speak in Italian? My heart started pounding in my chest.  
"Ciao." I waved weakly.  
"Do all Italians get red like that, its so cute~! You remind me of mi amigo, Lovino. Do you know him?"  
"S-si, we've met." I stuttered.  
"What a coincidence! I'm going to see him now! Do you and Feli want to come? He barely sees any of his friends, I bet it'd cheer him up a bit." He cheered.  
"Whoa whoa whoa, 'Antonio' get your own Italian!" The albino spoke again, who is this guy?  
" I think the decision is up to the lady, si?" Boss said nicely.  
"Was war das? What? Do you think all the Italians belong to you?" He asked.  
"Only the southerners." Boss said innocently after thinking about it for a while.  
"She's not a southerner she's a nun from the Vatican, saying that is like saying you own the pope. Now isn't that blasphemous?" He grabbed my hand,  
"I know a nun when I see one, I'm catholic. A nun would be excommunicated dressed like that, is he bothering you?"  
"Bothering?! I though YOU were bothering her! Damn...this is awkward then...kesesese."  
"Thank you albino-bastard, but I'll be fine." I said letting Feli tow me away, I turned around a waved smiling slightly, feeling sorry for the bastard...leaving the albino with a shocked look on his face. Hope the bastard will be okay...  
Prussia's POV  
"I think I'm in love." I thought I'd help this curvy brunette...but whoa...wait vat? Vat the hell am I saying?! I'm too awesome for relationships! It was a one-time thing like everything else! Now time to focus! I just met the enemy. He seems none too bright so doing this will be easy! Kesesese! "Time to invade South Italy's vital regions!"  
Hungary's POV  
"Mister Austria I got here as soon as I could! What was the emergency?" I panted.  
"What do you mean? Zer is no emergency here, just good music." He said irritated.  
"B-but the messenger bird..." I held the note.  
"Let me see." I handed him the note, he turned the note to face him. On the back was the real note:  
Kesesesesese! You're so very stoopid! Preussen forever!  
"I'm going to kill him..."

Romano's POV

Great! What was I thinking?! I'm going to the tomato bastard's house to visit myself! How am I going to pull that off?! Feli gave me a worried look and held my hand tighter…Even someone as oblivious as my brother, knows that I'm in deep shit here. Maybe I should decline or something…

"Um Antonio?"

"Si? Is something wrong? You both look like you did something wrong?" He held a smile, uhhhhhh, how am I supposed to say this.

"Actually we heard about fratello's injuries so we already went to see him, he was really moody you know how fratello is. I think it scared Chiara here." Feli started, che?! Where did that come from?!

"Um, s-si." I agreed. I see how Feli got out of trouble during our times as children.

"Oh, lo siento then, Lovi doesn't mean it, he's just has a hard time trusting is all, we only got each other, he doesn't know anyone outside his brother and I." He chuckled nervously.

"I see, but still…" I thought of what to think next.

"Me and Chiara here were going swimming!" Feli cheered. What the fu_

"Oh well, I better go see Lovi. You two have fun!" He smiled and waved. Wait! What?

"Ve~! Sorella, hurry up and wash all that off I'll meet you here with your clothes!" Feli pushed me into a clearing down the hill where a lake rested to greet me. I didn't even know this was here.

"Grazie, fratello." I muttered.

"Ah!" He smiled widely as if I've never said that to him before…" Ve~! That's what brothers are for!" He smiled again and ran up the hill into the road again.

I guess I get undressed I slipped out of the dress and all that shitty anti breathing garments, enjoying the air I was finally able to breathe, and pulled out the hair extensions. And slipped into the water till it was neck high. I looked at myself in the river. I look ridiculous with short hair and make up, so I washed it off immediately. Despite the sparkles and perfume, I liked being a boy, being a girl came with too many ridiculous things, periods, boobs, corsets, suitors, marriage, dishes, cleaning, child birth… Let's not think of that one…this was too relaxing for that.

Prussia's POV

"Kesesesese! Who knew I'd find South Italy so easily and bathing nonetheless, I should go for awesome sneak attack! Your as good as Prussian territory!" I jumped out the bushes.

"Keseseseses! Your vital regions are mine!" I declared pointing my sword at him. He gave me an annoyed face, stubborn kid.

"No." He said turning away.

"Was? What do you mean, no?" I've never had this problem before usually they admitted defeat. What's with this kid?

Romano's POV

"No, non, nein! NO." I said, I'm tired of people thinking they can just drag me away just cause they say so, I had enough with Turkey! Wait isn't this the self proclaimed 'awesome' albino from earlier, he must be a stalker. Wait, I was wearing women's clothes, so there's no way, he recognizes me. "How did you find me?" I tested.

"I asked a villager if they saw a brown haired boy with a curl, anywhere. And they led me straight to you South Italy!" He laughed again, who goes 'kesesese'?

"I see, Spain wouldn't let you take me." I said, turning away.

"Well he isn't here now, is he? Where is this boss of yours now? You're mine now. Out of the water now." He swung his sword closer to me.

"I can't, I'm naked, stupid albino-bastard." I pouted.

"Don't be so shy, it's nothing compared to my 500 meters! No one's quite as awesome as me, I make no judgments." What? What does that have to do with anything? Men…

"It's not that bastard! I-I'm_" Should I tell?

"Ve~! Sorella!" Feli ran down the hill, his eyes closed as usual.

"Feli?" Prussia asked, he knew him?! Why hasn't he told me?!

"Oh~! Hi Prussia!" Feli cheered, trying to push the dress under a bush with his foot, very noticeably.

"What is that? Feli! Don't interfere! I don't want to hurt you, west, would give me an earful!" He picked up the dress. "The hell?" He looked to the dress, the clothes Feli, was holding then to me.

"WAS?!" He turned red then covered his face an sighed. " Hungary told me South Italy was a boy."

"I am damn it!" I said pulling the towel Feli threw me around me.

"Ve~! Please don't tell Mr. Prussia, sorella has to do this! Bitte!" He begged, where's his pride, I swear…

"Since when did you speak potato, Feliciano?" I barked.

"Erg…ja. I'm going home now." He embarrassingly turned around.

"Grazie!" Feli cheered. "You too."

"Yeah-yeah, grazie, albino-bastard." I said.

Prussia's POV

"Well that was…embarrassing." I admitted. My heart is still beating fast, that stupid kid was that curvy brunette from earlier? Mein Gott that's got to be blasphemous to think of a boy like that. Wait! She's a girl pretending to be a boy, so that all right, right?! "I knew my awesomeness wouldn't let me feel anything that was wrong! Kesesesesesesssesese. South Italy will be mine!"

"PRUUUSSSSSIIIIAAA!" I heard someone screech. When a pan was thrown an inch from my face, oh, time to go! I (awesomely) in the opposite direction, cause I'm too awesome to run away.

"Come back here you're so dead!" Hungary yelled, about a mile behind me, kesesese, I'm so awesome!

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**Okay! Before you start pelting me with rocks! I AM NOT SAYING BEING HOMOSEXUAL IS WRONG! This is placed back in a daze, they didn't look onto homosexuality too nicely. I support gays, straights, lesbians, transgenders, etc. I believe love is love, it doesn't matter the gender, so please put the rocks down...thanks:) Next Chappy Austria's gonna pick Feli up from Spain's, wonder what dangers ensue? Especially with Hungary chasing Prussia around Spain's house, and with France visiting? First meeting of the Bad Touch Trio!**


	8. Troublemakers like them

**Hi guys! I'm back! My laptop broke, so I borrowed a friends:) So M BACK! YAAAY. N sorry for the wait. Nyways if you like please REVIEW! DANKE!**

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Well that was weird as hell, now that loud mouthed albino-bastard will tell everyone my secret, damn it. He looked embarrassed…che palle! I'm the one embarrassed not him! Honestly, damn it. This whole situation is spiraling out of control!  
"Ve~sorella. Are you okay?" Feli asked.  
"Not in the fucking mood right now Feliciano." I gritted my teeth, he knew the bastard, and even worse, he spoke POTATO now too, what the hell?!  
"Ve~! I'm sorry sorella, it's just I live with Mr. Austria and I want to talk to Luddy too!"  
"Who the fuck is this 'Luddy guy?! Huh? He better not be a potato too!"  
"Well_"  
"Non consentito! You hear me! NOT allowed!" I yelled shaking him by the shoulders.  
"I would appreciate if you kept your hands off my colony, it's really inappropriate." Piano-bastard.  
"Well, I'd appreciate if you kept your hands off my fratello, fucking cock sucker!"I yelled.  
"So undisciplined, Spain is too easy on you." He scoffed.  
"Well fuck you too!" I flipped him off, fucking piano-bastard had it coming.  
"Honhonhon did someone say 'fuck'?" France said suddenly popped out of the bushes.  
"What the fuck France?" I asked. Ignoring Feli's 'big brother France' greeting.  
"Oui, when is the fuck?" He asked staring at Austria in a lustful way, causing Austria to shudder in sudden fear of his well-being.  
"No one said anything about fucking, so get your mind out the gutter, wine-bastard!" I yelled.  
"Why don't you call me big brother like your brother since our having a hard time deciding on 'wine-bastard' and 'France'?"  
"Wine-bastard, it is."  
"Alas the mood is ruined." He said stepping completely out of the bushes, he handed me some flowers. "How is my petite frère coming along?"  
"Good…bastard. My ribs still hurt though." I pouted, stupid Grandpa Rome, I hope I'll never have to see his face again! And why did he get me flowers?! Thats just wierd...  
"Ve~? Oh yeah, I hear you got hurt, what happened Lovi?" Feli asked, oh yeah, I never told him, it's better to keep it that way, I don't want grandpa Rome to become violent with him too.  
"I_I..." started.  
"He fell down the stairs running after Spain, and broke two ribs!" France said suddenly..  
"Owie! Ve~! You shouldn't be walking let's take you inside!" Feli pulled me away again, Feliciano may not be strong but when he wants you to go somewhere and he gets your hand, he's not letting go.  
"Fine, fine."  
"You better be out in 5 minutes, Feliciano!" Fagstria yelled.  
"Come inside bastard, Spain won't mind." I yelled, I only get to see my brother a few times within a month, he could give more time with him, stupid piano key sucker!  
"How about me?!" France bit on a hankerchief and cried, like usual.  
"Is there ever a time, when Spain kicks you out of his house, stop being stupid." I scoffed.  
"But Lovino, it's your house too." He said lowly, but I caught it.  
"No it isn't, I just live here…for now." Feli stopped pulling me, and France and Austria paused in the middle of the stairs. What now_oh...  
"Lovi? What do you mean 'for now'?And where have you been?" Spain appeared in the door way, his facial expression looked hurt, damn it, damn it, damn it, he wasn't supposed to hear that!  
"Y-you heard me damn it!" I said and pushed past him and went into my room. Fuck, why'd he have to hear that?  
Damn these tears! I'm a man damn it, I don't care what the wine-bastard says! I still shouldn't cry!  
Stupid tomato bastard, he should know that I don't want to be a colony forever. I am a country after all, I think sometimes he forgets that, I'm not just some kid, I'm fucking South Italy, damn it! The supposed to be successor of my grandpa's empire, not that I give a flying fuck about the old man, it's just I'm expected to be great damn it, and if I'm not...I'll die, someway, somehow. I can't stay in your shadow boss, you know that, so...why?  
Damn it! Too much damn emotions! I'm starting to sound like a chick! I undressed to take a siesta, and slipped on a satin shirt with some missing buttons Spain threw out. N-not that I kept it because it smells like him, I kept it because it's soft okay!  
"Come back here Prussia!" I heard some yell, then a pan came crashing into my window. The fuuuuccck?!  
"MISSED! Kesesesesese!" I heard as someone climbed into my bedroom window from the vines. He stumbled in after tripping and noticed me half-dressed on the bed, nothing but the fucking shirt that had only the 4 bottom buttons, leaving a column of my bare chest exposed. That perv! "Uh, I should leave." He said after covering his face, again, what's with that ? Everytime he sees me he does that, I'm not that ugly, stupid!  
"Wait! Uh_ what's your name again?" I was going to ask him who this 'Luddy' character was, but I didn't even know who this guy is. Wasn't it Russia or something?  
"Oh, me? I'm just about the awesomest nation to ever exist!" He announced rather loudly, snapping out of the face covering thing, then putting a foot on my bed and posing. This guy is ridiculous. I fought the urge to giggle, uh_ I mean laugh! Men don't giggle, that's for chicks!  
"Oh you're that Russia guy, right?" I guessed crossing my arms and turning away, damn this is awkward, and I'm NOT blushing!  
"Prussia! With a 'P' damn it! I'm nothing like that creepy bastard!" He yelled. " And you're South Italy, ja?"  
"I don't speak potato unlike my potato loving brother, so don't speak it, unless you wanna fight, damn it! For all I know you could be calling me a name, damn it. Use some fucking manners! I'm not speaking Italian to you, am I? And_" I ranted.  
"Feisty little runt aren't you? Kesesesese, it's true what they say South Italy does look like a tomato. Kesesese." He mused.  
Damn Spain going around telling people I look like a tomato what the hell is wrong with him?!  
"I do not look like a fucking tomato okay!" I said over his obnoxious chuckle/hiss whatever the fuck that is.  
"Yeah sure, well the awesome me, is leaving now. Tschau, you understand that much, ja?" He raised a brow.  
"I told you I will never speak potato damn it. Now Ciao!"  
"You already did though, herr tomaten." What was that about a tomato?!  
"Fuck you, fucking potatoes stealing our language! Vaffanculo!" I ranted some more, why does this bastard irk me so much?! Maybe because he's albino...nah, that's not it, it's that cocky smirk of his! Damn! My question, I reached out and grabbed his cape. "H-hold o-on damn it, I needed to ask you a question."

"Ask then Herr tomaten." He said a bit irritably, as if someone was chasing him. Probably was as obnoxious as he was, I might as well make this quick.

"Stop calling me that!" I warned.

"Was? Herr Tomaten? Would you rather me call you 'Romano'? That is your name isn't it?" He thought after a while.

"Y-yeah." I nodded.

"Isn't that a name of a tomato?" He mused.

"NO, that's Roma tomatoes, bastard! If your going to insult me do it correctly!"

"Ja, ja, your question, what is it? My awesomeness can't possibly be talking to a tomato all day can it?"

"Damn potato. Anyways who's this 'Luddy' person?"

"Ah, west! That's mein bruder. Why do you ask?"

"My fratello, keeps talking about him, he seems to like him a lot."

"Ja, Ita has the biggest crush on mein bruder, it's so cute~!"

"Yeah, whatever. Does this Luddy character know that my brother has a crush on him?"

"Well he's a smart kid, but dull when it comes to emotions, so probably not, not to mention that West also has a crush on Ita as well."

"Does he know my fratello is a boy?"

"Um...Ja?"

"That's all I need to know." Looks like I'll have to go see Vatican this week, to see if he picked up on it. The last thing that I want is for my brother to get excommunicated for his sexuality.

"Kesesesese, we might be brother in laws in the future, herr tomaten!"

"Tch, whatever, didn't you have somewhere to go?"

"Not really, I have a question for you now."

"It's only fair,I guess, hurry it up. Before Spain finds you in my room."

"Who else knows that your a madchen?" I didn't need to know potato to know what that meant.

"France and my fratello."

"How about your grossvater?"

"My gross what? Are you insulting me again?"

"Nein, your grandfather."

"Oh. No. He started taking care of us when we were old enough to take care of ourselves, he thought I was a boy so I went along with it."

"I see, don't I feel special?"

"You promised!" I hissed.

"Romano! Are you okay? Did something happen?" I heard Spain yell from the stairs, shit!

"Get out!" I growled. " Through the window!" I pointed.

"Are you crazy there's a crazy she-witch with a pan down there waiting to kill me!"

"Does it look like I care? Leave!" I hissed, trying to push him out the window.

"Lovi? Do I hear someone up there with you?" Spain's voice echoed from the stairs. Both of us froze, potato backed up from the window and tried to hide in the closet, but I had stuffed all my mess from this week in it, instead of cleaning, damn... He just turned to me and shrugged, and hopped on my bed, making himself at home.

"Oh no you don't bastard!" I yelled.

"Lovi?" Spain called again.

"Uh_no!" I yelled.

"Let me in Lovi, please. If I did something wrong, I'm sorry." Why is it always your fault bastard? Why can't you just blame me for a change? Or leave me alone when I'm mad?

"You didn't do anything wrong bastard, now go away." I huffed while trying to figure out where to hide this albino potato.

"I don't believe you, I'm coming in ahora!" Spain said, I could hear him turn on the knob. What is up with him? Usually he'd give up and give me space.

"NO! You can't, I'm um_ naked! Yeah, I'm naked." I heard the potato chuckle as I pushed the door in so he wouldn't come in.

"It's nothing I haven't seen." He assured, oh yes it is!

"B-bastard! You've never seen me naked!"

"Okay, so? It's not like I haven't seen un pene before, it's okay, at your age it's fine to be a bit pequeño, si?" I can't believe he just said that... I'm only a few years younger than him damn it. I heard a muffled laugh, the potato was rolling smothering his obnoxious laughs in my pillow, ha ha, hope you've had a good laugh, because it's going to be your last once I throw you out the fucking window, addio potato bastard.

"N-no! I-I have a really bad scar, a-and I don't want you to see it." I stuttered, a bit flustered, he thought I was small?! Bastard, if I had one it'd be as big as anyone else's! I

"Lovi, lo ciento. Por favor, no me dejes. Te amo." My heart stopped. And my face was on fire.

"Oho, this is too good." Potato bastard smirked looking at my reaction. Okay, I'm so fucking headbutting him so he can land on his fucking head when I throw him out of the window.

"Come out por favor? I made pasta." I can feel him smiling from behind the door, that damn smile that bends my will.

"I-I'll come out in a bit." I said sheepishly.

"Vale. I'll see you in a bit." He said, I couldn't detect if he was happy or sad. And that's rare for him, all thanks to the potato, speaking of...

"OUT!" I growled.

"Ja, ja, I'm going." He stood.

"Wait. I'll show you out, to make sure you actually leave, potato-bastard." I narrowed my eyes, "Turn around."

He grumbled a few things and then turned around, I bound my chest, slipped on a corset, and then put a shirt and pants on.

"It's sure taking a long time, a _man _shouldn't take so long." The bastard said before sighing.

"Well I'm not a man, and you try to fucking tie a corset on your own." I hissed.

"Well, well, Herr Tomaten seems to have some sexual confusion." The bastard raised a brow.

"If I had to choose, I'd be a man." I said in all seriousness.

"That be a waste, such a cute face on a man would be sinful." He muttered something that sounded like 'at least for me'. What the fuck does that mean?

"I'm not cute!" I yelled.

"Oh right, you're handsome."

"Shut up." I grumbled, I'm tired of this fucking albino potato, how does he go from 'I'll cover you' to 'I'm going to hang around to listen to your personal affairs' not only did he know I'm a girl, he knows I like Spain! He better keep his mouth closed or I'll castrate him with a spoon! "Let's go." I muttered.

We snuck around the house like elephants in a window store, fucking potato keeps running into things. Sooner or later someone's going to find us.

"LOVI!" Spain yelled.

"COMING!" I yelled, we were so close to the back door when...

"Prussia!" "YOU! YOU ARE SO DEAD!" "Ve~Mr. Prussia!" "Mon ami! What are you doing here?" "Lovi…who is this?"

"I didn't know it when I first met this bastard, that he'd cause THIS much trouble! I should've pushed him out the window." I thought.

"Eh? What can I say I'm a troublemaker." He shrugged and winked at me, and grabbed my hand and held it. I looked at Spain and he stared at our locked hands like sun beams would burn a hole through the potato's hand if he glared at it long enough. Was that jealousy? I never had that happened before…

"D-did I say that out loud?!" I turned red.

"So cute~!" Spain broke out popping out of his stare like he does most of his emotions.

"Oui." France agreed.

"Ja. Like a tomato." Prussia added.

The three looked at each other.

"That's what I say!" Spain perked up and took his hand out of mine to shake it. "I'm Spain."

"Prussia."

"France!" France butted in. "I meant to introduce the two of you."

"Oh so this is the guy…" They trailed on as they went inside.

"Ve~ Fratello will you be alright?" Feli asked, while I rubbed my temples.

"Si. I'm used to the bastards already... sadly." I sighed.

"Gut, I am taking Italy now. Before this house becomes collapses. Anything any one of those 3 touch turns into trouble, now they're all under one roof." Austria shuttered. "Good luck Romano, Feliciano in the carriage."

"Aw…addio fratello!"

"Addio!" I waved.

Only Hungary smiled ear to ear, real creepy, ya kno?

"So what was that?! Do you and Prussia have a thing? Oh and the way Spain looked at the two of you I thought he was going to flat out punch Prussia, that comment really did save his face… but not for long." She held up her frying pan.

"I don't know what he was thinking, maybe since it was because France and Spain was there, you know how guys like them do crap to worsen the situation subconsciously." I grumbled, still upset at all the fucking time I spent trying to hide him and he fucking just shrugs and holds my hand!

"I know there should be a name for troublemakers like them." Hungary smiled.

"Yup, they have the bad touch."

"Ha! Say that again!" Hungary smiled.

"Um…they have the bad touch."

"The bad touch boys…guys…men." She tried. Really? Where going to give them a name? Well I guess it'd be easier than saying France, Spain, and Prussia or was it Russia? The Potato! You get what I mean. Since they bonded so friggin quickly, I could hear their laughter and chatting from inside, they so were cut from the same cloth. Idiots all of them.

"Kesesesese, trying to put a name to our combined awesomeness, I see?" Prussia popped out along with France and Spain.

"There's three, how about Bad touch trio?" I commented half-heartedly, I just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry.

"That sounds badass! I like that! The bad touch trio!" Prussia…Russia? The Potato announced putting his arms around Spain and France's shoulders, they're friends now, how cute, not!

"I'm going to bed now." I said tiredly, just being around these 3 drains my energy. Up until now they've be three separate troubles. Not they're a trio.

"Okay, see you later Lovi." Hungary waved.

"Uh-huh." I waved weakly.

"Oi! Romano don't be like that!" Prussia yelled, I looked back, now they had drinks in their hands! FUCK! Maybe the house will really collapse!

"Si, come hang out with us." Spain invited.

"Oui, we can have a good time." France just sounded like a prostitute.

I'm going to get out here before anymore weird shit happens.

"No." I declined a returned to the shelter of my room, I was about to turn on the lights when, I noticed a shadow sitting on my bed.

"So, you're the South Italy." A man's voice said, this accent was foreign to me, who the hell is this now?! Can't I get a break?

"Who the hell are you?!" I said turning on the lights.

"Who am I you ask? That's a funny question." He said standing, raising a bushy brow. "I'm your new master, at least I will be."

"You…it can't be_ are you…"

England.


End file.
